Hello,
My name is Zach Berwaldt. And this is a very delayed response to Zed’s blog post about Perfectionists and The Epic Failure Meltdown.
I had one today. I was working on ex43 of the Python book. I was working through it and I got to just before Zed’s implementation and in my head:
“Well, I can’t do this.”
“How am I supposed to make it exactly like Zed’s?”
“Welp, I guess I have no choice but to look at the answer”
[proceeds to scroll down and cheat myself out of learning]
which is why I’m here. Perfectionism is annoying, and I don’t wish it on anybody.
I become more convince every time I have one of these “meltdowns”, that it’s the single biggest obstacle that will keep me from reaching any worthwhile level of proficiency at programming. More importantly, thinking, problem solving, and creativity (which is just problem solving).
Personally I think perfectionism (at least for me) stems from a couple of things:
- Feeling like you don’t know enough
- Lack of confidence
- Lack of process, and I mean a process to work through every time you catch yourself going into meltdown mode.
A sidebar: You can probably wrap these all together, because in some ways they are interconnected, and have some weird sci-fi symbiotic relationship. They feed off each other until you overload and meltdown.
The rest is:
- unfounded beliefs
- Some level of OCD
- Too much pride/high expectation of self.
For example:
- I believe I have to get it right on the first try.
It’s a dumb belief and expectation to have, that has no basis.
But I have it for some reason that is ingrained in me.
Nature, Nurture…pick your flavor.
Few Strategies that helped me:
-
Go outside for a walk: Having a meltdown is always a good cue to step away for a minute. Leave your Ipod and/or cell. Then enjoy, walking is like meditation.
-
Be cognizant of yourself: I know me, I know where I tend to go off the rails. Knowing is half the battle to mitigating meltdowns. Consciously challenge your thinking. But not for too long because then it becomes a negative feedback loop.
A Simple: “Hold on a minute, why do I believe that? that’s not accurate. It’s a simple problem, let’s break it down…” will suffice most times. -
Commit to changing yourself: I don’t see any other away around this last one, but that doesn’t mean there is not one. But being a perfectionist in a lot of ways is a learned behavior pattern, and it I think it comes down to exercising discipline and trying hard to force yourself to not follow that pattern. Create an environment where you have to do that. Close the book and really focus on working out the problem for brief periods of time. The Pomodoro technique can help with this, so you don’t burn out.
Now mind you, I’m still learning to do this, and I’m a grown man. So be kind to yourself.
Deep down, I know I’m learning a new way of thinking about problems and that takes time and patience.
I understand probably most of this is “duh, common-sense!” stuff. But I’ve been struggling with it and creativity and finding problems to solve (which is a whole 'nother can of worms), for a while and these are the conclusions I’ve arrived to thus far.
I feel like I’ve lost my train of thought, so I’ll stop here.
I hope it was helpful. If not, I’ll do my best to clarify. Or if it’s really bad, not continue at all.
Zach
